Way #4: Host your women's shiur at 16 Handles

Way #3: Be the first to get a hold of the bangitout.com IPO prospectus

Any bar mitzvah can offer stock picks. Demonstrate how important you are by showing how close you are to the real Wall Street action. Rumor has it that they are going to use the IPO proceeds to buy the Mets.

Way #2: Check in on Foursquare

Imagine how many girls will want to be set up with you when you are the mayor of O.Z.

Way #1: Eat tons of chulent and don't get fat